STIFLED CRIES

It is hard to imagine that in a metropolis ,in this age and time  , there can exist a strong taboo about giving birth to a  female child. Surely all that happens in less literate, rural .. backdrops.Wish that it were true though.Time n time again I come across some cases of these misguided souls who still view a girl child as a liability . These are educated,"modern" urban folk who can go to any lengths to ascertain ,albeit illegally ,the  sex of the unborn child so  that an unwelcome female child can be timely eliminated with minimum fuss or furore.What saddens me is that if all the education ,television campaigns and social awareness could not purge our mind of this rot then nothing can. It just seems to be a slap in the face of all those vociferous advocates of feminism who are screaming from the rooftops for equal oppertunities and payscales for 

women when the very existence of women seems to be jeopardised. What sort of a  regressive society are we shaping into... ?How can a society be in denial of fifty percent of its population?Have we ever thought how those unborn girls would have perceived us whose life was cut short  on a whim... 

STIFLED CRIES FROM BEYOND

When the doctor said "It'll be a girl"
I felt your throat go dry
And sensed a tension in your nerves
Why,Oh Mother,Why?

I had thought you would be wild with joy
Instead, you wrung your hands
And I felt the sinking of your heart
That I failed to understand.

But all the disappointment and the fears
That you tried so hard to hide
Are now soaking through my heart
And stifling me Inside.

Your whispered arguments with my dad ,
(Were you afraid that I would hear?)
And the pangs of guilt that tortured you 
Were more than I could bear.

So night after night I've waited
to hear your verdict with bated breath
And with every doubt that crossed your mind
I died a thousand deaths.

But today your mind is made up
At last you are looking relieved again.
At the cost of the life of an unborn child
Its not such a bad bargain

I know i should feel cheated -
I've been denied the right to be born
But its worth it if after sleepless nights
You can wake up to a peaceful morn.

After all ,I was conceived with love
If not nurtured with it,
And its better to cut my life short now
Than to kill me bit by bit.

'Cause I would have been an unwelcome guest
In you all too  peaceful world
But I wonder if it is my fault at all
That I happened to be a girl?

We Are Watching You...

We are watching you ..

Every gesture ,word or deed,

The way you speak,  command or plead,

The words that often go unsaid__

The way  you smiled when your heart bled...

We have watched you praying night and day,

Blinking stubborn tears away,

Wrestling with the fears that cling;

And Forgotten heartaches that still sting ,

We were watching you..

 We have seen you grapple with truths n lies-

 Dressing hard facts in disguise

 To spare the pain that might come our way

 You closely watch every word you say.

When all of a sudden you are so jolly and bright

and say,  "Everything will be all right"

We know there are answers you are trying to find

 To deal with fears that gnaw on your mind.

And all the time ..we are watching you...

We see you trying to calm your heart

 And doggedly trying to play the part

 Of the perfect parent , our ideal--

 ...and....becoming something so unreal.

  We knew when you were just so stressed_

 Troubled,worried and depressed.

 Though you seemed calm and in control

 Trying to do justice to your  role

Yet we knew...

So today we want you to know -

We understand _we love you and we care.

We can deal with pain,loss n despair

And we'll be strong, come what may

Cause we have watched you night n day.

So please don't feel incompetent or small

You may be our  parents but you are human after all,

And subject to all human follies too.

But

When you were carefully watching over us...

.......we were carefully watching you. 

-Parul Mathur